Dean Pelton: I first met Chang when I hired him as a Spanish teacher at Greendale. Then he became a disgraced student, psychopathic music major, homeless vent dweller, security guard, keytarist, power hungry warlord, and now, Kevin. It’s sad to see him like this. Well, it’s mixed. He was pretty terrible before.
Britta: I’m developing a theory which some find controversial. Perhaps Chang actually used to be Kevin, went crazy, and became Chang. And then, at some point, Chang hit his head, went un-crazy, thereby reverting back to regular old Kevin again.
Dr. Kedan: That makes no sense. Science tells us hitting his head would only cure him if hitting his head was the original cause.
Britta: Told you it was controversial.
Dean Pelton: This documentary needs to be convincing. This needs to be the Hoop Dreams of things people care about.
Kevin: Welcome to Shirley’s Sandwiches, where the food is Kevinly.
Kevin: No, you didn’t. Shirley said it, remember? You said, “You hired Chang?” And I said, “I’m Kevin, and you are?” And you said, “Not calling you Kevin,” and I said, “Hi, not calling you Kevin. What are you having?” And you said, “None of this.” And then Shirley said, “I don’t care what he calls himself. He’s a hard worker. We’re all broken people, and we all deserve a second chance. Like how I gave Andre a second chance. Doesn’t mean I forgot. I just forgave.” And you said, “Chang didn’t sleep with a stripper. He tried to kill us. Why does everyone keep forgetting all that?” And then Shirley said, “But he didn’t, and you used to be a sleazy lawyer.” Her words.
Jeff: Wow. That’s quite a memory you have.
Kevin: Well, my short term memory has actually improved. My doctor calls it a, um…side effect.
Jeff: I know Chang slipped up. He’s not smart enough to play dumb all the time.
Dean Pelton: What the heck, Abed? You knew what Jeffrey was planning to do the whole time? Why can’t you ever make a documentary about the thing you plan to make a documentary about?
Britta: Don’t censor him! Censorship. This is the documentary.
Dean Pelton: Ugh.