A Community/Rick & Morty/Dan Harmon Fansite (Community season six doesn't suck)

Basic Human Anatomy

Jeff: Come on guys, I’ve got class in 15 minutes. This should not be that difficult, we just need to figure out an idea for our final history project.
Britta: What we need to figure out is Greendale’s obsession with group assignments, classic herd mentality.
Jeff: All right, Britta doesn’t have one. Who else?
Pierce: I’ve been told I look like a Kennedy.
Jeff: Nope, not an idea. That’s a statement. Anyone not on medication?
Annie: Jeff, we have to take this seriously.
Jeff: This assignment? This, we have to take seriously? “Pick any moment in history, and tell me about it. Be as creative as you want, or not. I don’t care. Professor Cornwaaa–” He didn’t even finish signing his name.
Annie: Okay, yes, he phoned this one in, but my run at Valedictorian is in jeopardy.
Shirley: As in mine
Annie: As is Shirley’s, and I just took one for the team by accepting that C-plus on our last history project.
Shirley: As did I.
Annie: As did Shirley, so I’d think you’d want to rise to the occasion and help me get back on top.
Shirley: Or me.
Annie: Shirley, I’m speaking for both you and me.
Shirley: Then you might want to teach you mouth how to say “we” “our” and “us.”
Pierce: I’ve been told I look like a Kennedy.
Jeff: Nope, still just a random statement, and still useless.

Pierce: You guys are dating? Man, somebody’s sure working her way around the table. Aren’t you?

Abed: All right, man. Change Up. 13 Going On 30, 17 Again, 18 Again, Vice Versa *throws it away*
*gasp*
Troy: Judge Reinhold.
Annie and Shirley: Oh.

*lights switching off and on*
Maintenance Worker: Sorry, routine light switch check.

Abed (As Troy): Oh my God this is wrinkling my brain! And of all the days! I got a big important meeting with my study group!

Jeff: You’re getting beat by Leonard?
Pierce: He’s soooo old.

Abed (As Troy): Remember when we pretended to switch bodies yesterday?
Jeff: Unfortunately yes, dorks.

Jeff: Dean, I need you.
Dean Pelton: *gasps* It’s happening. Shut the door.

Dean Pelton: Wait. How did they switch bodies?
Jeff: Well, they held onto the DVD and said…
Both: I wish I could switch places with you for just one day.
*lights switching off and on*
Dean Pelton: Oh! OH! OH! AHHH! *gasps*
Maintenance Worker: Sorry, routine light switch check.
Jeff: That is NOT a thing!

Dean Pelton (With Jeffrey Inside Him): *fake texting*
Jeff: YOU’RE NOT EVEN HOLDING A PHONE!

Britta: So, Troy… How’s Abed coping? I mean, with his day in your body?
Abed (As Troy): You’d have to ask him. I, for one, am freaked. Look at his arms and legs, he’s like the pick-up sticks of people.

Dean Pelton (With Jeffrey Inside Him): Uh, I’m in Greendale, stuck in the body of a man who could be Gollum’s shadow. So yeah, I’d say it’s half past suck.
Annie: *laughs* Yeah, totally. Half past suck, that’s funny.
Shirley: Okay, that’s creepy.

Dean Pelton (With Jeffrey Inside Him): Leonard, we just looked at your transcript.
Leonard: I knew this day would come. I’m outta here.
Dean Pelton (With Jeffrey Inside Him): There you go, my work here is done. You’re one and two again. Now, you can direct your anger and resentment at each other. Congrats.
Leonard: Classic wrap-up.
Dean Pelton (With Jeffrey Inside Him): Shutup Leonard! I’ve got a picture of your old nose, it was a lateral move!
Shirley: Dean!
Annie (Turned on): Dean.
Shirley: Annie.
Annie: Why is this happening?

Jeff: Holy makes complete sense at this school!

Annie: So, I’m number two again, which is what it is. But you know, if I’m not going to be Valedictorian, I’m glad it will be you.
Shirley: Mm, me too.
Annie: You mean you it’s me if it’s not you, or that you’re glad it’s you?
Shirley: Yes.

Dean Pelton: Guys, I need to apologize for my behavior today. With I switched bodies with Jeffrey-
Jeff: Nope.
Dean Pelton: I thought I knew what it would be like to have Jeffrey inside of me-
Jeff: That did not happen.
Dean Pelton: But as it turns out, having Jeffrey inside me-
Jeff: Nope again.
Dean Pelton: only brought out the worst in me. Which is to say, having Jeffrey inside of me-
Jeff: No one was inside of anyone!
Dean Pelton: was wrong…. to have Jeffrey inside of me.
Jeff: Shut up!
Dean Pelton: So I’m sorry.

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P.S. Dan doesn't suck.
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