Economics of Marine Biology

Jeff: So, a rich dumb-dumb who will never graduate and keep dropping money into the school indefinitely. Got it.

Britta: Is there really that much money in this, Dean, or is it like that endorsement deal you made with let’s potato chips?
Dean Pelton: If you don’t like the crispy-licious taste of Let’s, feel free to eat that other greasy brand.
Troy: Splingles? Not this guy.

Dean Pelton: Ugh. Britta.

Troy: You know what the commercial says. “Keep your damn hands off my Let’s.”

Pierce: Hey, Jeff, there you are, I was thinking we could swing by this great barbershop I know. You’re looking a little stubbly, and nobody handles a razor like an Italian. They develop nimble fingers from pleasing their mistresses.
Jeff: Thank you for opening my eyes to two new stereotypes.

Annie: Those school board guys were right. Britta, where do we get drugs?
Britta: Really?

Troy *crying*: You guys, behave! Hit the showers! Everybody in the showers! Please stop hitting each other! Hit the showers!

Dean Pelton: Now, I am a man of very little integrity, and I let students get away with practically anything on this campus. But I will not allow Greendale to lose the things that make it Greendale.