Annie: Bring it in for a boob bump, ladies.
Britta: It’s called a Muffin Top, Abed.
Abed: Like a muffin. Clever.
Britta: Women of Greendale! This cafeteria is hereby declared a bitch-free zone!
Shirley: Why name your daughter Megan? Are you stocking up for a bitch shortage?
Abed: Which one’s Meghan? The one with the hole in her sweater’s armpit or the one whose tight sleeves are pushing her fat toward her elbows?
Britta: No, those are her cronies.
Abed: So Meghan’s the one with the crooked ears and no ankles?
Shirley: Ha! Damn.
Joshua: I’m Joshua, and this is a place of peach and balance. A place of nourishment, a place free from darkness.
Joshua: I wasn’t sure that you would take to the trampoline’s ways, some can’t.
Joshua: And some are just natural jumpers.
Annie: You’re like a machine.
Abed: Like Robocop.
Britta: Exactly like rowboat cop, Cherise is a bad rowboat. Sink her.
Pierce: I’m gonna slit your butt’s throats.
Abed: Hey Jeff, what’s with the boots? 2008 called to tell you that even in 2008, those were tacky.
Jeff: Why don’t we all just take a deep breath and…Find some center.
Pierce: Okay, that is it! What are you hiding from me?
Pierce: They’re keep relaxation secrets, tell me how to get this laid back, or I’ll kill your families!
Pierce: I’m watching you two, 24, 2010. These balls on your butts.
Joshua: Guess it goes to prove what I already knew: non-whites ruin everything.
Troy: Oh my God, Joshua was racist. That came out of nowhere.
Jeff: Did it?
Joshua: A place free from darkness. And Some are just natural jumpers. It’s going to be a maze.
Jeff: Let me buy you some ice cream, my white guilt is doing somersaults.
Troy: Worth it.